9 years. I've been in EMS for longer than I feel like I have really been an adult. Yeah, I had some growing up to do along the way. Life is a process, but if you acquiesce, it works. You grow into things and eventually, you grow out of them.
I don't have to decide today, or even in the next couple of years, but I do need to begin to think about whether medicine is where I need to spend the rest of my career. The hours are brutal, the personalities and environments are extreme and not conducive to living a long and healthy life. I do find EMS fulfilling, there is no doubt about that, but in the long game, I think I am meant for something far different.
Now I don't think that I will ever get off the truck. I can see myself off picking up hours, taking classes, keeping my certifications all up to date and even moving into a place where I try and organize studies with local providers as well as being an active provider of training on some level. But I doubt in 5 years that I will be a full time paramedic.
Sometimes we all need a reset button in life, I guess. In these two episodes, remakes of the audition tapes for public consumption, a few changes are made along the way. Fortunately minor tweaks early on can have a big impact in the end.
There is something about a man that we need a challenge to overcome. There is a hill that must be taken, a mountain climbed, a hot rod built. We have to walk the Appalachian Trail. But what if you were without limits to challenge. What if the constraining bonds were society and challenges against it? Obviously Superman and Tyler Durden are on opposite sides of the fence. Superman upholds civilization against all odds while Tyler is an incorporeal mad bomber & cult leader who leads the disaffected and bored against a society that they feel holds them back from being supermen on their own.
We're the middle children of history, man. No purpose or place. We have
no Great War. No Great Depression. Our Great War's a spiritual war...
our Great Depression is our lives. We've all been raised on television
to believe that one day we'd all be millionaires, and movie gods, and
rock stars. But we won't.
What do the challenges in our lives mean? When I was at Castle Peak, what the mountain meant was far more than what the mountain was. What is life without something to overcome?